CLIFFORD HALL'S JOURNAL ~ 1943 - 1947 Page 7
April 1 1945
Worked all day at Cheyne Row. I will underpaint this in blue and white, simplifying it as much as possible.
April 2 1945
First sitting for Kate's portrait. Tried a number of different arrangements and made a couple of drawings.
April 3 1945
Started to paint Cheyne Row in a blue monochrome. Must get it finished this week.
Evening, saw Peer Gynt for the second time. Marion and Lillian were with me. It is a very wonderful play and magnificently done. I could never tire of Ibsen. He knows as much as it is possible for a man to know.
April 5 1945
Yesterday I drew in Kate's portrait on the canvas. Very glad I had made the sketches last Monday. A good start.
Today I have completed the monochrome of Cheyne Row.
April 6 1945
Made a drawing of Zorro, the clown who was with Paulo's Circus, before the War. Did this from another drawing, one that I sold last year and now have back for framing.
Evening: drew from the nude. Four drawings, two passable, two for the stove.
April 8 1945
Another sitting for the portrait. Washed it in with coloured turpentine. So far, so good. I must make a really fine thing out of it. I must. I am very nervous about it. Another sitting tomorrow.
April 9 1945
Kate's portrait is going well and she is an ideal sitter. I begin to feel this painting can be a success, if I do not try to take it too far: that is if I allow myself to concentrate on the design as the means to express the mood. What I must avoid are facts for the sake of facts. Only those which express the feeling may be used.
And gradually, I am finding a technical method of painting from the model that really suits me, although I still feel that the best way is to paint from drawings and away from the model.
Other subjects, yes, but I am not yet sufficiently advanced to paint a successful portrait from a drawing: perhaps because what I find most fascinating is the mood, the expression that does not last, and the only way I can get it is when I have the model actually in front of me. I am rather dismayed when I look at the several portraits I have painted of Hanna. At the time I was convinced that each was an excellent likeness, but on looking at them some time later I find each is entirely different. Perhaps that is just as it should be and there is no such thing as day to day exactness. I don't know.
April 10 1945
Regent Street Polytechnic this evening where I am to teach Antique drawing two evenings a week. What a different atmosphere compared with that frightful place at Wimbledon. To be with people who really want to work. I must get a few more evenings, and then Wimbledon and I say 'goodbye', forever.
April 11 1945
Worked at the portrait. I am looking forward to going on with it again next Sunday.
April 12 1945
Painted by the river - Battersea Bridge. Evening, Polytechnic again.
Yesterday evening went with Marion to see Strindberg's 'Easter' at the tiny Gateway Theatre, Notting Hill. The first two acts worried me. I felt that the players were all wrong, and then, in the last act Lindvist (Esmé Percy) appeared.What a fine performance he gave. At once the meaning of the play became clear, the symbolism understandable. Yes, the rest of the cast had not understood what it was all about. Or should I blame the producer for this? The last act, which is Lindvist's act, made the evening a million times worthwhile. Lindvist is God. I found a similarity between this play of Strindberg's and Ibsen's Peer Gynt. Both, I think, are concerned with the same theme - How should we behave here on earth? Ibsen is of course, entirely interested in the problem of the individual, whilst Strindberg deals with more everyday people, also Strindberg is more sentimental, more personal in his conception of God. Ibsen is more austere.
April 13 1945
Painted by the river on one of two gesso primed cardboard panels Holland* at the Chelsea Art Stores presented me with this morning. These panels were to make up for several he had done for me on which the gesso cracked. This time parchment size, instead of ordinary size, has been used.
* Walter Percy Holland (1884-1961), artist's supplier.
I worked on the almost white ground, and although I prefer a slightly toned ground to paint on there is no doubt about the extreme luminosity which results from omitting the preliminary toning. Fortunately this light ground suited the day which was bright and sunny although slightly misty. It was so lovely by the river. The sun was hot, and I had to take off my coat. Yesterday was very different, heavy and foreboding. The river has more moods than the most temperamental woman.
April 14 1945
Liesel. I drew her sitting on an easy chair with the bed in the background. Would like to paint this but cannot get enough sittings. Spent the evening with Bill.
April 15 1945
A long sitting for the portrait of Kate. Going well, I think. Very tired now. Will wash my brushes and go to bed. Another sitting tomorrow.
April 16 1945
Worked at the portrait. As I get towards the end of a painting always a nagging feeling of dissatisfaction comes on me. Starting and finishing are two very different things.
April 17 1945
Sketched by the river. A lovely day and a steady light I used the other panel Holland gave me. I had toned it previously in the usual way. The toning improved the surface but it was still slightly greasy and unsympathetic. If I buy the other from him I will paint on the back, which has only had one coat of gesso applied more roughly with big brush strokes showing. I will tone down the extreme whiteness before painting
The portrait of Kate has taken most of my energy for the last three weeks and I have enjoyed painting it. Now, of course, the inevitable reaction has come and I am worried about it, dissatisfied almost to the point of wanting to scrap it and paint another. If only there was more time, unlimited time, if sitters didn't get tired: and change too. And yet there are good things about it, and if I do not see it for a while and then suddenly come on it afresh I may like it better than I do at the moment. She is really delighted with it. That is good, as far as it goes. And for me, there are times when I can never be satisfied. I have short bursts of satisfaction but they never last for long. It is all as it should be, but it makes me sad. It makes me go on as well.
April 18 1945
Kate here for a last sitting. Worked on the yellow drapery and the background and painted it better than anything else in the picture, and it keeps its place, back - where it should be. I do feel tired. I must have an easy day tomorrow.
April 19 1945
Started a careful line drawing of Cheyne Row. I want to use this for a small panel, and I want to get it painted before the leaves come out much more. Sunday morning; if only the light is good.
April 20 1945
Went on with yesterday's drawing, brought it back and traced it through onto a gesso panel. Model this evening.
April 21 1945
Started a painting of Liesel. Didn't like it. Wiped it out. Tried another pose, much better. Made a drawing. Will paint next time she is here.
April 22 1945
Painted the small panel I had prepared of Cheyne Row.
Am taking Kate's picture to her this evening. Will be glad when this ordeal is over. It is Lillian I am worried about - she may not like it.
(later)
This evening was a great success. On the way there I felt so nervous. John was pleased, Lillian was pleased, Kate had been pleased from the start. I am very glad, but I know I must do lots better. And I will.
April 23 1945
Hugo Zeiter* brought Tony Gerbola's** boy here for me to make a sketch of him in clown's costume.
* Hugo Zeiter was an American photographer and collector of circus memorabilia who was stationed in England during WW2 while serving with the US army.
** Michael Gerbola, better known as "Clown Tony", was a clown who worked for the Bertram Mills circus.
April 24 1945
Made a drawing for another version of the bather's theme
April 25 1945
A few more sketches for the picture; also worked at a little pencil drawing of two whores I saw yesterday evening walking in Bond Street.
April 26 1945
Went to Battersea where I had seen some barges with red sails furled. Painted a 14" x 10" panel. A very grey, slightly misty effect. Was able to get something reasonable before the tide came in too far.
Tomorrow that frightful place at Wimbledon will commence again. If only I could see my way to giving it up; but I can't - yet.
Work this last month of freedom:
1. Kate 24" x 20
2. Cheyne Row (monochrome preparation) 24" x 20"
3. Five panels
4. 10 drawings
April 28 1945
Miserably depressed as a result of yesterday. Made seven or eight drawings for the picture. Only one worth keeping and that is too slight, but at least it is exciting. Tore up the others.
About 3 I went to the river with my sketch box. I wandered about for an hour and could not make up my mind to start painting. Came back and did some work on chapter 9 of Greaves. I have been neglecting this for weeks, almost for months. I must get away from that stupid job. But how?
April 29 1945
Spent last night here at the studio and slept well. I love this place. Went to the river and painted. Wind, sun and lovely colour. Cold.
Later in the day I did some more writing. I want to get this study of Greaves finished, then I will try to leave writing alone, except for my scribbling in this book.
April 30 1945
Model this evening. A magnificent figure. Made two drawings with which I am only fairly satisfied. Tore up the third. The temperature in my room at that frightful school today was 47 ºF.
May 19 1945
Did not feel like working. Went to the National Gallery with Marion. A few of the paintings are back there. Very happy to see them once more. Rembrandt's self-portrait is astounding. A pinnacle. Most of the pictures are, as yet, without a glass and how much finer they look as a result. What a delight to actually see the Velásquez Philip with no exasperating glass in between. The Renoir Parapluies is perfect. Also, recent acquisitions of the Walker Art Gallery. A superb Sickert, 'Bathers at Dieppe'. How poor John and Steer appear beside this Sickert, although I must admit that both John and Steer are badly represented. A charming Conder of the seaside, weak maybe, but in delightful taste. An abominable Reynolds; almost as bad as a de Glehn, and amazingly like that vulgar fellow. A good number of pretty commonplace paintings. Must not forget an extremely fine portrait group by Zoffany and an exciting sea piece of Turner's.
May 20 1945
Started a painting of Hanna - 24" x 18". I will go on with it tomorrow.
May 21 1945
Morning. Went on with the picture of Hanna, A good start.
Afternoon. Worked at Cheyne Row. I think I am really beginning to paint better on a monochrome basis; and to READ my drawing.
Evening. Drawing from the model.
May 26 1945
Worked at the painting of Hanna. It is going well, but when will I be able to finish it?
Last night saw Lillian and went into how much I have to come from the gallery, up to the present. Here are the figures:
From Gallery £44.13.4
From Peter Stone 5.5.0
Portrait of Kate 30.0.0___
79.18.4
In Post Office 7.10.0___
87.8.4___
From the Polytechnic I should have, as far as I can tell, £46.4.0; of which amount nearly half, I fear, will be stolen by the Income Tax. So
£87.8.4
23.2.0
10.10.4
Dare I do it? Leave that horrible school at the end of term? I should have from them, if I left, my superannuation money amounting to about £44.7.8. Halve that, because of the robbers and we have:
110.10.4
22
£132.10.4
I suppose with this and my evening class money we could keep going for the best part of a year; in the meanwhile I would make every effort to get one or two days at an Art school. If I did not succeed in doing this it would not be good at all. No doubt there will be a certain amount from sales of my paintings but I certainly cannot depend on that.
I must make up my mind by half term - June 11th - or shall I keep on until the end of the year? If it wasn't for having these two amounts cut in half I wouldn't be hesitating. I must give it up, this five day teaching, sooner or later. Instinct says now; but I must think of Marion and Julian. I hate making decisions. I rather wish the school would give me the push, and save me all this trouble.
May 27 1945
Worked a t Cheyne Row and in spite of a certain amount of difficulty it is now looking a good deal better. Disturbances too. Jonzen* and his wife called about 12 and we and had a drink. Reg Reynolds came - 5.30 with two girls he was showing round Chelsea! And the painting really has improved.
* Basil Jonzen (1913–1967) an artist
May 28 1945
A frightful day at Wimbledon.
Evening: made three drawings from the model. Feel better now.
June 1 1945
Now I can write what I have been wanting to write for a long time. I am leaving that horrible school at the end of July - forever.
On Tuesday last Brownsword* asked me if I had made up my mind to finish with my full time teaching, because he thought he could offer me one full day in addition to the three evenings I have already. I said I had been trying to decide, but that now he had spoken to me I had decided. So the next day I saw the Drage and in the evening I told Brownsword I could take the day, starting next September, if it was available. He said 'That's fine. I will arrange for you to start in September.' It was done in a most charming way, with an understanding I deeply appreciate.
* Harold Brownsword (1885–1961), a sculptor and the headmaster at the Regent Street Polytechnic from 1938–1950.
Just think. One day and three evenings, just enough to keep things going, and six days every week in which to paint. I have been wanting this for years. It's not too late. I am happy. Everything depends on me now.
June 2 1945
Made a large drawing of the round table in the studio, with all the odds and ends it amuses me to keep on it. The case of birds, a little wooden lay figure, which I never use, books, papers, a vase, a dish, an ashtray.
June 3 1945
Depressed. Had an early lunch and went to sketch by the river. It all looked horrible and made me wonder how I had ever enjoyed painting there. Came home and at once started another drawing of the table, this time with an artificial carnation in a glass jar as a starting off point. I enjoyed it and lost my depression.
June 4 1945
Saw an exhibition at the Wilenstein Gallery. Very fine. I found myself preferring the British paintings, represented chiefly by Sickert, Whistler, Greaves, Gore, Mathew Smith, Innes and John., to the French - Utrillo, Bonnard, Segonzac, Matisse,Van Gogh; and of all the works the Whistler nocturne gave me the most pleasure. Immediately I was conscious of the mood, the atmosphere, the utter feeling of the scene - but how can I express it in mere words? With all the other works I felt the paint first, the mood afterwards, and that is the wrong way round. The flop of the show is Pasmore, although it was rather cruel to hang his 'Wave' immediately above the Whistler. The James Ensor is very lovely.
From the sublime I went to the Royal Academy. Here vulgarity and incompetence reign, almost unchallenged; but Ruskin Spear is good, so are a few of the John drawings. Kelly's royal portraits are amazing. He has compiled them as his namesake compiles his directory, nothing is omitted. The method does not work with painting. Too bad, Mr Kelly.
Had lunch with Lillian.
'Cheyne Row'. I have made this too COLOURED, far too coloured. I will rub it down with glass paper and redraw it, then repaint. The shadows across the road are ridiculously purple. There is too much blue. The entire canvas needs reconsidering. I am inclined to think that in this case the blue underpainting was a mistake. White tinted with Indian red would have been far better.
Redraw with Indian red?
June 8 1945
Made three drawings from the nude this evening. The first, dull, the second sensitive but lacking in meaning; the third, although wild and even brutal in execution has got something which really pleases me.
June 9 1945
Sandpapered a good deal of the paint off the canvas of Cheyne Row - until the underpainting began to appear; then started to redraw it in varying mixtures of Indian Red and Blue. I have put in three figures; it needed them, and begins to look better already. I will work at it again tomorrow and possibly on Monday as well.
June 11 1945
Worked at the Cheyne Row today and yesterday. I am certainly learning a great deal from it, and very slowly, I am beginning to see something emerge. I have to pay the closest attention to my drawings. I must study them close to and also from a good distance off; only then can I get what I want from them. The colour sketch is nothing like so important.
June 16 1945
Did a number of drawings from a new model. Most of them were bad, only one might one day give me something.
June 17 1945
At last another sitting at the painting I commenced of Hanna sitting at the window in her room.
June 23 1945
Worked again at the painting of Hanna. A very questionable proceeding I fear, this painting from nature, from sitting to sitting; particularly in a sunny room. With a north light it is a different matter altogether. If I paint any more in her room, and I do want to, I must work smaller and complete in one working. I feel I have got something worth getting in this canvas but the light has played the devil with me, and I nearly ruined it this morning and only saved it by working at it here in the studio, without nature jumping about and distracting me so to speak. Four sittings, and I have to admit I have done all I can.
June 24 1945
Painted a little head of Leisel, and I worked pretty hard at it.
June 25 1945
Drew from the model. Then I foolishly started to try and improve one of the drawings and completely ruined it. So I tore it up. But I like the painting I did yesterday.
And I am very worried about the painting of Hanna. There is never enough time for her to sit, and it does want more doing to it.
July 2 1945
Yesterday I made a drawing in black and red for Everybody's Weekly. I wonder if they will like it? Their paper and printing is so bad they will probably ruin it in reproduction. Anyway it was fun to do.
I have been working at the 24" x 20" of Cheyne Row. One day I am sure I will be able to paint really well from my drawings.
Saw Henry Rayner 's show of drypoints on Friday. Very, very good indeed.
July 7 1945
Did a few pencil sketches of a sky for the Cheyne Row; also a little panel which was so bad that I had to wipe it off.
They are going to use the drawing a did last Saturday. I am surprised. I will spend tomorrow at Cheyne Row. Must repaint the tree and the sky before anything else. Then there is the painting of Hanna. I want to go on with that. Next week I hope.
July 8 1945
I did not go on with Cheyne Row, instead I made a sketch in body colour and a drawing in black and white of the table with some flowers in a vase and the sofa covered with a shawl.
'Portrait of Kate', 1945, by Clifford Hall. Clearly, when this photo was taken the canvas was in need of restretching.
May 4 1945
Did not go to the ice-box yesterday or today: no point in being shut up in an unheated room all day in this weather. Made some more sketches for the picture. Still having difficulty with it.
May 5 1945
Painted a small sketch in colour of the picture. This, at least will serve as a start and it has the mood.
Varnished four paintings with mastic varnish. Emie, Back Stage, Evening, and Hanna at the Dressing Table. Evening - I made some sketches of Elizabeth.
May 6 1945
Painted an 18" x 14" sketch of Elizabeth. Enjoyed it immensely.
The Chelsea Art Stores have a most lovely painting by John Lewis Brown, the contemporary of Guys and the artist who, it is said, influenced the early paintings of Toulouse-Lautrec. Brown, I believe, spent most of his life in Paris. There is a painting of his in the Hugh Lane collection and I once saw a pen and ink drawing for sale in the Place Pigalle but didn't have enough money to buy it. This picture I saw today is of a woman seated side saddle, riding a beautiful grey horse. Two dogs, very like the dogs sometimes seen in drawings and lithographs by Lautrec are running behind the horse. She rides through a wood. The grey of the horse, the darker grey of her habit, the cool greens of the foliage behind her and the almost black notes of the dogs, make a most exciting picture. Too expensive for me. The horse is in profile. The dogs are placed on diagonals - perfectly placed.
May 9 1945
Made a careful drawing for a painting.
I cannot begin to tell you how sad I was yesterday when I should have been happy. Why? I wanted the war to end, and quickly. Went to Piccadilly yesterday evening with Marion, Bill, Dumps and the girls. Thousands and thousands of people. Nothing for them to do except shout and climb lampposts. No bands, not even canned music. Nowhere to sit but the kerb. As for refreshments -. I thought regretfully of one fourteenth of July in Dieppe, long ago. We lost the others in the crowd and walked back to Chelsea. In Margaretta Terrace some people had a piano on the pavement. There was a bonfire in the centre of the street and they danced, with horrible awkward movements. All the same it was the only cheerful sight of the day.
May 12, 1945
Painted most of the day but it beat me and I wiped it all out.
May 13 1945
Started to colour the monochrome of Cheyne Row, and had a good day.
I gently sandpapered the monochrome before beginning to work on it. This gave me an excellent surface.
'Hanna', 1945' by Clifford Hall.
'Hanna in the Mirror', 1945 , by Clifford Hall